“Some actually marvelous function . . .”


The headline was the actual true beginning of today’s spam comment, which came courtesy of Zemcron78349MVh, who hails (I imagine) from a lovely little Quonset hut on the edge of the Taklamakan. The spam included a friendly invitation to invest in something called the Tedotron, which, as far as I can understand, is a machine for converting overlong speeches not overly full of sense into power for running the parts of government I completely love my tax dollars getting spent on. Not that it’s a lot of tax dollars, considering I’m an artist of some kind. Anyway, for the first time ever, I’m taking this particular spam offer seriously for at least a minute. Which is now over.

The image is an imaginary book page from the first of about seven or eight of these book projects I’m hoping to finish within the next six weeks. We’ll see if that happens. I mean, it needs to happen, so maybe it actually will. The decks aren’t clear, exactly, but I guess I’m ready to go, as I knock on all the wooden objects in the vicinity for good luck.

By the way, did you know you can only use a maximum of ten pieces of Dover clip art in any one project? That’s at least what it says in the fine print. So this will be a short book if I can’t figure out another solution. Which I’m going to go try and do now.

Also, yes, that’s right, the typeface and the wood engraving are from different time periods. I think about a hundred years different, maybe a little more. But in the end all the images are going to be from different decades up and down the timeline, whereas the text will all be set in the same face (whichever one I decide on for the final version).

And don’t worry for now that the caption is not the right name for the animal. Or, actually, worry about it, but not too much, not yet. Ultimately, though, you’re definitely supposed to worry about it a lot. If I do my job right, which is still an open question.

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